Turning over a new leaf

Over the past semester I really haven't been very social - mostly because my time has been consumed with learning the Spanish language.  Now that the semester is over, I had full plans to continue learning the language at a much slower pace and with much less stress.  (That way the things I learn will actually stick rather than leave my brain after a test.)  Well, this has not been working out super well since I really have little reason to practice...funny how being accountable improves performance.

I have also thought a lot about how the apartment complex I live in is so much different than other places I've lived.  People know each other less - or are less friendly.  I decided that maybe it was just my not really getting to know people in the previous months.  I have planned on becoming more social and improving...with this new decision right about the same time everyone was leaving because they were finished with finals.  Any ideas about the outcome so far?  ;)  Oh well.  I also found some great insights from church today from a talk by Robert D. Hales called Waiting Upon the Lord: Thy Will Be Done it is amazing!  I kept thinking about how we (myself certainly included) tend to decide .... is what I want to have happen in .... amount of time.  It will just happen that way if I do .....  While this is certainly a great method of goal making, some things are just not within our realm of control; It is not OUR decision.

A purpose to all things.

Many years ago, as a small child my siblings and I were each given some money to buy presents, or to spend it on what we liked.  Since we grew up in a very small town and a very large family, having money to spend in a mall was not a frequent occurrence.  After I had purchased a few suckers the size of my face for friends or siblings, I thought I would still have enough to do something great with my left over $5.

As we walked out of the mall there was a man dressed in dirty, worn-out clothing, and I overheard my mom and grandparents say something about how he's asking for money because he had no home to my brother.  I decided, everyone I know has a place to live - and does anyone really need candy?  I was at the end of our small group walking and decided I could put my money in his bowl and nobody would know.  I sneaked back to reach up and put my money in his bowl, but as I pulled my hand back the man looked over at me.  Then, with a look of gratitude that I will never forget said, "God bless you child."

Few experiences have had such a profound impact on my life.

I've decided there are things in my life that I would like to improve.  I will start to really "Blog" about my experiences.  The first of which is writing down all the characteristics I was before everything shifted.  It has been very interesting to learn a few things.
One: there will never be a time in life that everything is just perfect.  It's OK, that's why we are here, to always improve.  I knew this was true, I just forgot it.  Even the times when we feel we were our best selves, there are factors that makes us human.
Two: there are some things that come up more frequently than others - those are the more important ones to focus on.
Three: when working to improve oneself, and looking at yourself under an magnifying glass, it becomes more apparent when others seem to show characteristics you desire in a way that is much more than what you are doing.  Again, this is just fine.  It shows a great example of what you can do in a real life setting.

"There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living."
Nelson Mandela